…in its time…

This picture was taken on our mission trip to the Rez this summer.  I remember getting this picture from Justin and having a little epiphany.  Our children will have a different childhood than most.  No better, no worse…just different.  Initially, the idea of that was very disconcerting to me.  Then, I got this picture.  Sissy loves hop scotch.  She’s loved hopscotch as long as she’s known what it was and even when she wasn’t very good at it.  Her Mama secretly loves hopscotch too. So do our Navajo friends.  More than I love the simplicity of seeing my girl playing hopscotch, I love the commonality that hopscotch symbolizes for our family.  Different is not always bad.  Different is what makes us beautiful.  

I love watching my little ones love on their friends out here.  Watching the shades of their tiny hands holding onto one another and seeing genuine love between them is often the best part of my day.  Little Man has a favorite friend out here and for posterity, I’ll call her Sweet Z.  Sweet Z is about a year older than he is…but they are around the same size.  Y’all, our sweet boy adores her.  And their little friendship is beautiful because of the simplicity in which they enjoy one another’s company.

On Tuesday evening, we went up to one of the local churches and I had my first lesson in making fry bread.  While I was busy learning how to create deliciousness to feed my family, my children were making some of the happiest memories.  Do you know what they were doing?  Playing in dirt, throwing a football, digging in a fire pit and pretending rocks were pies and having J eat them.  Simple. And, do you know what else?  They never once complained about being bored.  There was no whining, there was no in and out of the church.  There were just shrieks of joy and happiness and loads of laughter from my three favorite littles and their new friends.

Last night, we walked to the vineyard by our home.  On the way there, we stopped in the peach and pear orchard.  We got some fresh pears, peaches and the sweetest green grapes I’ve ever eaten, literally.  When we came back home with our loot, two of our new friends were waiting at our front door for the girls.  A brother and sister duo who are perfectly sandwiched between our girls and our little guy.  They ALL ran into the house and began playing.  Again, squeals of joy and laughter filled our home.

As a little girl, I wanted to be a mama.  Oh, I wanted to go to college and get a degree.  I wanted to do life but more than anything in this world my greatest dream was to be a mama.   To have my home filled with laughter and joy and little people and their friends. I have spoken about my angry conversations with God when it became evident we were moving here.  Conversations where I specifically stated that THIS was not my dream.  “What about my dreams?  Don’t they matter?”  And then, the still small voice said, “Your dream was to be a mama, remember?  You can do that anywhere.”  BOOM. Mic drop.

You see, the beauty of this very different life is it’s the exact life I asked for even as a little girl.  Friends, God wants us to have the desires of our heart.  He wants us to tell him about our dreams.  His desire only for what’s best for us.  That doesn’t mean that they always look exactly the way WE picture them.  Never in a million years did I imagine I would be raising my family in the desert.  However, I have a family.  I have little people and their sweet friends to fill my house with laughter and joy.  I have a husband whose desire is to lead his family well and to point us towards Jesus at every turn.  This isn’t going to be a perfect life but its beautiful nonetheless.

“He has made everything beautiful in its time…” Ecclesiastes 3:11